Hey, Diary
by clazface
Summary: A few moments in the mind of Kate Fitzgerald.


HEY, EVERYONE. LONG TIME NO UPDATE, HUH?  
>So, this is something I wrote for a homework many moons ago. I'm not entirely happy with it but I'm afraid it'll have to do.<br>Happy (or sad, I suppose) reading!

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><p><strong>Kate Fitzgerald's Diary Entry<strong>

Hello, again. Your space is running out and I'm afraid that this is the last entry before I have to get a new diary. There's a lot to tell after all. Here goes:

Leukaemia. A jumble of letters that seems almost to have no meaning; such a small word to encompass such big problems. Now, Promyeloctic leukaemia sounds more complicated, especially when you try to pronounce it, but it still doesn't even begin to cover everything about the illness, and people hardly ever even think about how it rips the families apart. Funny, that.

But I've done it. Anna's going to get a lawyer now, and she's going to get the rights to her body. I'm not going to get that kidney from her. Which means I'll die. Am I scared of dying? Yes. Terrified. Am I scared of living? Even more so. I don't want to go through my life like this, or what I have of one. Constantly sick, in and out of hospital like a yo-yo. Constantly hurting everyone around me, causing them pain, and worry, not letting them live their own lives as they should, especially Anna. Sometimes, mom acts as though Anna's nothing but a donor anymore. Actually, that's mean. I'm sure she loves Anna really; she's just not that amazing at showing it.

Anna though, is 'good old Anna', dependable as always. She's like the main character (that's the protagonist, actually-the only useful bit of information I learned in English) in a book of mine. Her friend compares her to mayonnaise-the substance that keeps the whole sandwich together. A metaphor, you know. But then this really good friend of hers, a movie star, incidentally, tells her that she's special sauce, like the thing that not only holds the sandwich together but also changes it and makes it a whole lot better.

I ended up ripping a few pages out of that book, because it seemed unfair that her biggest problem was a fight with her best friend over a boy. She had the life I wish I had. I mean, I don't even have any friends, let alone a best one. It wasn't such a good book anyway-way too cliche.

However, my loss of temper is not the point. The point is that Anna is special sauce. She could do whatever she wanted if only I wasn't here to hinder her. She could take what I have of life and put it together with what she has and do amazing things. Somehow, it just doesn't seem right that I should take away the life of another, only to continue something I don't really have. She'll do great things, I _know_ she will.

Oh, and mom, if you're reading this (which you undoubtedly will-I know you like to snoop) show this to Anna after I'm gone.

Anna, you can be brilliant, no, _will_ be brilliant without me to hold you back. Go be a famous hockey player, or writer, or whatever it is that you want to be. Have an awesome life and don't ever think that you did the wrong thing. Grow up, fall in love, do the whole brilliance thing and live _your _life. Just remember me once in a while, please, and maybe come visit my grave or something. Never forget that I love you all.

Huh. I just had a really weird thought. What if none of you find this diary, like, ever. Maybe it'll be dug up 1000 years from now. In that case, I'm Kate. Kate Fitzgerald, and this is my family-Anna, Jesse, Brian, and Sara. So, to whoever reads this (providing you can actually read this and the pages haven't rotted), that's me. Wow, and now I really am running out of space.

Kate Fitzgerald

_(signature)_

P.S what do you think of the new signature? I'm not so sure.

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><p>What did you think? Tell me, please.<br>Yes, yes, I know. Boring. Personally, I hate reviewing. I never know what to say, and don't feel that putting a couple of words is enough.  
>However, I have no problem with you just giving me a three word review or favourite-ing (HOW DO YOU SPELL THAT WORD? MIND BLANK) without reviewing.<br>Clazface xxx


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